do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
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so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
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When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
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