so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
i dont even know how to be here
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
