And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
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Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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