just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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