They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
