9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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