Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
