you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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