Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
