You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
