the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Everclear isn't food dammit
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize