Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
