i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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