He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
