nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize