kristin has been a bad kristin
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
