We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
