Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
