I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
