I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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