I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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