it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
