I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Randomize