Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
organizing the empties. That sober.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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