Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Randomize
