are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
