Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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