dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
