What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize