Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize