Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
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He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
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Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize