stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.