people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
