I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
