very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Randomize
