yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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