idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Are we still banned from the library?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Randomize
