I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Randomize