have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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