Girls should come with a carfax report
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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