i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
