just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Dick very happy bro
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize