We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
