guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
