I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize