Pappa wants mamma naked
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
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