And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
