I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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