I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
