Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
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