I am in a vortex of obligation.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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